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The Financial Diet
I’m A Recovering Emotional Spender — Here’s How I Budget
I’m A Recovering Emotional Spender — Here’s How I Budget
The Financial Diet
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33:08 · Apr 2, 2026
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I grew up thinking that like,
0:01
having credit card debt is just part of being an adult.
0:04
I owe about $30,000 in consumer debt.
0:07
I bought myself this beautiful like Louis Vuitton Masters designer bag with uh the
0:14
matching wallet,
0:15
which is like so cute, so chic.
0:18
Problem is, I spent $3,000 on those things,
0:21
and I was making $15 an hour part-time.
0:24
At least for me,
0:25
I grew up with an idea of what I thought my life would be
0:28
like,
0:29
you know?
0:30
I thought it was a given
0:31
that I would get a house
0:33
and have kids and like kind of white picket fence American dream,
0:36
the whole spiel.
0:37
I may never own a home, sure,
0:38
but I don't find it particularly sad anymore,
0:42
cuz I don't think it has to be.
0:43
I think financial freedom looks different for everyone.
0:50
Hey guys, it's Chelsea, founder of The Financial Diet,
0:53
here to welcome you to our new little mini series on the channel called
0:57
the No Fuss Budget.
0:58
We are always listening to what you guys want to see more of on
1:01
TFD,
1:01
and probably the number one thing you guys tell us is
1:04
that you want more real,
1:05
relatable budgets from real people.
1:08
Uh so, we reached out to the TFD community
1:10
and we're lucky enough to find several people who are willing to welcome us
1:13
into their literal homes
1:15
and share all of the numbers of their budget.
1:17
They live in different cities, they work different jobs, they spend different amounts,
1:21
they have different financial problems and goals,
1:23
but each of these episodes is going to deep dive into their individual budget
1:28
and how they do money.
1:29
This mini series is also brought to you by Monarch,
1:32
which is the budgeting app
1:33
that I personally use
1:34
and have used well before we even started working with them here at TFD.
1:38
Um I cannot recommend it enough.
1:39
It is an incredibly easy-to-use app.
1:42
It works well for individuals, for uh couples, for roommates.
1:45
Uh it makes your money super easy to understand and visualize.
1:48
It helps you work toward your goals.
1:50
Uh it doesn't have ads, it doesn't sell your data.
1:52
It is just all around, to me, the perfect budgeting app,
1:55
and I actually reached out to them to see
1:57
if they wanted to work with us
1:58
because I loved using their app
1:59
so much.
2:00
It's basically the only thing I trust with my money after Mint,
2:02
and I check it probably upwards of five times a day.
2:04
I literally just checked it like five minutes ago.
2:06
So, if you are someone who's been thinking about getting the right budgeting app
2:10
and just sort of starting to get a hold of your money
2:12
and understand it better,
2:13
we highly recommend Monarch.
2:15
They are the brand who is producing this show with us.
2:17
But, all of that said, let's get into today's No Fuss Budget.
2:26
Hi, my name's Stephanie Janelle.
2:28
I work at a top university
2:29
as an events I make about $85,000 a year.
2:34
That comes out to, after taxes, $5,000 a month.
2:37
And I live in the Bay Area, basically in California,
2:39
so very high cost of living.
2:41
My total debt picture, uh in essence,
2:44
is I owe about $30,000 in consumer debt.
2:48
That's buy now, pay later loans, that's credit cards, that's, you know,
2:52
all that jazz.
2:57
How I got into that position is kind of a multi-faceted issue.
3:02
Uh there's basically three things that put me on the path toward that position.
3:08
One, what when I got my first job,
3:11
and this was at like Chipotle at 19, I was making $9 an hour.
3:16
My parents who I was living with were like, well,
3:20
you make your own money now, you can buy your own things, you know?
3:22
And once I went to college,
3:24
I basically never asked my parents for money again.
3:28
I lived off of money that I would make from my part-time job,
3:31
and even the loans, like the student loans,
3:33
I would take out the maximum amount
3:35
that I could and pay whatever I had to for school
3:38
and for,
3:38
you know, dorm and a food plan,
3:39
and then everything else was like >> >> my spending money.
3:42
So, I developed the habit very young that like,
3:46
I would live primarily off of like my part-time job,
3:48
but then the rest on debt, and, you know,
3:52
that was just like the thing for me.
3:55
I also learned like there's two things.
3:57
One, when I was 16,
4:00
I had a very personal like uh close family member to me die,
4:05
and it put me in a very like YOLO mindset.
4:08
Like, you only live once, you know,
4:10
he was 20 years old when he died,
4:12
and like didn't even get to drink really,
4:15
and it affected me deeply uh to the point where the the thought of
4:19
depriving myself now in my youth to like maybe be a millionaire at 65
4:23
like was just ick,
4:25
bro.
4:25
Miss me with that.
4:26
Like, it's not motivational at all.
4:28
I was very much like, I want to have fun now, I want to,
4:31
you know, go out
4:32
and do stuff with my friends
4:33
and all that kinds of stuff
4:34
and like that also leads to putting money on credit cards cuz I certainly
4:38
like couldn't afford to do those things.
4:40
And then lastly, and this was like a huge one for me,
4:43
because this is what has made debt for me really hard to get out
4:46
of,
4:47
I incorporated almost like this belief, which I think is, you know,
4:53
prevalent in a lot of like United States culture,
4:56
what you buy is like what determines or, you know, who you are,
4:59
what what informs who you are.
5:01
You put your money where your mouth is, kind of.
5:03
So, I, when I was younger,
5:05
like was really getting into sustainability and like ethical consumption, and, you know,
5:10
I wanted to support small local businesses and like buy from ethical companies,
5:14
and nine times out of 10, that's like the more expensive option, you know?
5:18
So, like if I had the choice between I could buy this thing from
5:21
Amazon or buy it from a small local business
5:23
and pay $10 more,
5:25
$20 more, I would always pay the higher cost.
5:29
The reason I I say
5:30
that that's really important is
5:31
because it made spending more money
5:33
and getting into debt feel really good for me.
5:37
Like, I felt it felt like a morally righteous choice.
5:40
And that kind of created a feedback loop of like,
5:44
I feel really good about spending more money consistently,
5:47
even if I can't afford it,
5:49
because I feel like it's the right thing to do.
5:50
I feel like I'm living within my values.
5:52
Over the years, like it's it's always been very difficult for me to logic
5:56
my way into being more frugal
5:59
because frugality often times is equated with being cheap
6:04
and giving up on like the things
6:06
that I really,
6:07
you know, want to to support.
6:10
I want to support these things
6:12
and and buy from these places
6:13
and buy these items,
6:14
these kinds of items.
6:15
I don't want to buy the plastic cheaper version.
6:18
I want to buy like the bamboo, zero waste, whatever,
6:20
and like the all of those things combined really just led to me getting
6:25
myself into a lot of debt.
6:30
My financial background is like barely anything.
6:36
Money was not talked about when I was growing up.
6:39
I grew up in a culture >> >>
6:40
that is very like you kind of show your wealth,
6:45
even if it means you go into debt.
6:46
Everyone in my family, I'm pretty sure, is in debt.
6:49
My parents were in debt.
6:50
It was very normalized for me.
6:52
It's funny, without any shame around credit, cuz everyone has it.
6:56
So, I grew up thinking that like,
6:58
having credit card debt is just part of being an adult.
7:00
It didn't really set me up well to be financially responsible as an adult,
7:05
cuz I was just like, you know,
7:07
I pay a credit card bill just like you pay an internet bill
7:09
or a phone bill,
7:10
you know?
7:11
Like, there's no shame in that.
7:12
It's just like what you do.
7:13
Having watched TFD and a lot of other adjacent like financial channels,
7:18
or I've read like different books on finances, things like that, I I've considered,
7:23
you know, when it comes to budgeting,
7:25
like what would work for me
7:27
because I am the way I am with money,
7:29
you know, I don't want to feel like I'm depriving myself of joy,
7:34
but I also want to be doing the right thing
7:36
when it comes financially for me.
7:38
So, like I've considered the different methods of like the avalanche method,
7:41
the snowball method, etc.
7:42
And at least for me,
7:44
the biggest things that I decided were just to simplify the numbers.
7:49
Like, I had so many variety of like little debts, so many credit cards,
7:52
so many pay monthly or like buy now, pay later loans.
7:56
Consolidating them into just, okay, I have this one big payment that has everything,
8:01
and I can more aggressively pay down like,
8:04
if I have an extra $300 at the end of the month,
8:07
I can put it toward that big payment,
8:08
and that pays that big consolidated loan down.
8:10
And I just do
8:11
that for like the big chunks of loans
8:12
that I have.
8:13
That's been, at least for me, the way that I prefer it,
8:16
like that works for me in terms of paying off debt.
8:23
The picture of my budget is as follows.
8:25
Like, my take-home pay is $5,000 a month, every, you know,
8:29
2 weeks, uh I get half, right?
8:31
So, for rent, I pay $1,420 a month.
8:36
That is because I rent a room in a house with multiple people.
8:40
I have two roommates.
8:41
I think the household rent is 4,000, and we split it, you know,
8:44
depending on the size of the room, things like that.
8:46
I think utilities are not included in that,
8:47
so that's like an additional $200 to $250 a month.
8:51
Gas, luckily, I drive a cute little Prius.
8:54
With these gas prices, like that's super huge for me,
8:56
so like I basically spend on average $30 every 2 weeks,
9:01
$60 a month on gas.
9:03
On my dog, cuz I do have a dog, his food,
9:06
he's like super picky, I spend like $70 a month on his food.
9:10
I think for food for me,
9:12
I probably try to stay around $300 a month.
9:16
Sometimes I go over because, you know,
9:18
I like like Olipop and things that are, of course, more expensive.
9:21
I have Mint Mobile,
9:22
so I pay like a plan that is 6 months at a time,
9:25
but that comes out to about $25 a month for my phone.
9:28
My car is $260 a month.
9:32
My insurance is $181 a month.
9:36
And my debt, basically, is broken down to all these different loans.
9:40
So, for, you know, paying for loans like Affirm and things like that,
9:44
I calculated it, and I spend around $415 a month.
9:51
This is usually for payments that like big things,
9:54
like my mattress that I bought that's over the course of a year I'm
9:57
paying,
9:58
you know, $100 or something like that.
10:00
And like my desk is another one.
10:02
I almost always use the buy now pay later stuff for like big chunks
10:06
where I don't want to spend $1,000
10:09
and I just break it up.
10:10
And so it it that adds up to like 400 and something a month.
10:13
And then I have multiple loans
10:16
that I took out to pay off my credit cards.
10:19
I have not one, not two,
10:20
but three of those loans
10:22
because I have been trying for almost a decade now to pay off this
10:26
debt.
10:26
So, the first one I took out initially was $10,000.
10:31
Now, um I have about like three,
10:35
$4,000 left on it and that payment is $236 a month.
10:40
I have another loan that I took out more recently.
10:42
That was for $20,000 to pay off credit cards.
10:46
Um and that one is my biggest one.
10:48
It's $552 a month.
10:50
And then I have the most recent loan
10:52
that I took out for my 401k
10:53
because it's a really low interest rate for of 7%.
10:57
That's like a $10,000 loan and that's $201 a month.
11:00
I also have my private student loan from Sallie Mae
11:03
that is $180 a month.
11:05
Uh and I have YouTube Premium, which I think is so worth it.
11:08
Uh and that's $8 a month.
11:10
And I have Patreon cuz I there's a YouTuber
11:12
that I a podcast I like to support
11:14
and that's $5 a month.
11:15
I calculated it.
11:16
All of the debt,
11:17
if I include like the consolidated loans
11:20
and the paying for
11:21
or like buy now pay later stuff,
11:23
comes out to $1,600 a month I'm spending just on debt.
11:28
Yeah, and the amount
11:30
that I have left over
11:30
if I calculate like the total of all those expenses,
11:33
I basically spend about $4,100 a month.
11:37
My take home is 5K.
11:39
So, I have let slightly less than a thousand to work with.
11:43
And the ideal is I can save 500 of
11:47
that and then the rest is kind of like for
11:50
if I end up wanting to go out,
11:52
you know, with friends to like eat and buy little thing here or there.
11:55
Like it's like the living expenses that just come up, right?
12:00
So, just to emphasize, the 5K a month is after taxes,
12:05
after my 401k contributions cuz I am still doing that.
12:08
I have an employer match that I, you know, match.
12:11
And so like that is just my take home, you know,
12:15
money to spend for the month for bills and all that.
12:21
>> >> My biggest spending regrets are almost exclusively just the things
12:27
that I have bought to to soothe my insecurity of like I want to
12:31
feel pretty.
12:32
I want to feel cool.
12:33
I want to feel hip or whatever.
12:34
I would buy things that I saw other people and I was like,
12:37
"Oh my god, they're so cool."
12:39
And like maybe if I owned the thing, I could be cool.
12:42
So, like a lot of these dresses you see here
12:44
that are like pretty prints are Reformation dresses.
12:47
Each one of those >> >> is like definitely over $100,
12:51
but I would say the long maxi dresses are like 218 usually
12:55
and the shorter dresses are like $160 each
12:59
and I have too many.
13:04
Behold my Boulevard of broken dreams, okay?
13:07
These are my dresses that I have from Reformation.
13:11
Reformation had me in a chokehold in the 2010s.
13:14
I don't I don't know what to tell you.
13:16
And I've sold a bunch, too.
13:17
Like this is not even including the amount
13:19
that I bought and
13:20
then sold or bought
13:21
and returned.
13:22
You know, I have plenty
13:23
that have still tags on them
13:24
because I told myself like,
13:26
"Well, when I wear it, I'll take the tags off."
13:28
And if I end up not wearing it and I end up selling it,
13:31
it'll be worth more with the tags on.
13:33
So, I always keep the tags.
13:34
And like my half of not not half,
13:36
maybe like a third of my closet is literally just like someone can shop
13:39
it.
13:39
It look it's like almost a store.
13:41
But perhaps the biggest spending regret that I have,
13:45
which is funny because it's like regret is it it's retroactive.
13:49
I don't I love having the item,
13:52
but I regret not having the money I spent to purchase this item.
13:56
So, I when I graduated college was like, "Oh, I'm going to treat myself.
14:01
I'm an adult now.
14:02
I just graduated."
14:03
And I bought myself this beautiful like Louis Vuitton Masters designer bag with uh
14:09
the matching wallet,
14:11
which is like so cute, so chic.
14:13
Problem is I spent $3,000 on those things
14:17
and I was making $15 an hour part-time.
14:20
Did not have the money to spend.
14:21
And also, looking back, I don't know what I was thinking.
14:25
This is bag is like way too big for me.
14:27
I only ever wear small cute little crossbody bags.
14:29
It doesn't have a strap.
14:30
It's like I have to hold it with my hands.
14:33
I hate I can't even put it on my shoulder.
14:34
Like it's so annoying to actually wear.
14:37
It's so it was so expensive.
14:39
I'm scared to like wear it out and damage it.
14:41
So, it's like I don't know who I thought I was,
14:43
but I it's honest it's the prettiest one of the prettiest decorations in my
14:48
room.
14:48
I'll put it that way.
14:49
It's like my holder of scarves and like I still have it.
14:52
I go back and forth every year of like, "Should I sell it?
14:56
Should I send it to like Rebag or one of those websites?"
14:59
And I always don't because I'm just like,
15:01
it's I kind of get its own right of like this is a moment
15:04
in time when I was delulu,
15:06
truly.
15:07
If I could go back, I would keep the $3,000 that I spent.
15:12
Or at the very least just get the wallet.
15:14
I don't know, man.
15:15
I don't know who I thought I was,
15:16
but that probably that all of the items
15:19
that I just bought for this fantasy version of myself
15:22
that doesn't exist,
15:23
those are the purchases that I regret the most.
15:26
Hands down, easy.
15:30
In South Florida, which is where I grew up,
15:32
there at least when I was growing up.
15:34
I don't live there anymore, so I don't know what it's like now.
15:36
But I I don't like the the keeping up with the Joneses type,
15:40
you know, attitude around people.
15:42
I I disagree with my family heavily on, you know,
15:45
they don't acknowledge that they have debt,
15:47
but they try to like The One of my aunts has this enormous house
15:52
that I know they're like up to here in debt
15:55
that they can't realistically afford,
15:56
but they host all these elaborate parties, you know,
15:59
with my extended family coming from like the Dominican Republic
16:02
and things like that to like show off.
16:04
Like look how we've made it.
16:05
And it's just not one the kind of person I am,
16:08
nor the kind of people I want to be around.
16:10
You know, I I very much want, at least for myself,
16:14
more of a quaint like cute little I would even like a one-bedroom apartment
16:19
that is just I can decorate myself.
16:21
Like I just want my cute little space where I can just have people
16:23
that I like love
16:24
and care about over
16:25
if I want.
16:26
I don't feel like I need a lot,
16:27
but um I don't want to do things disingenuously like that.
16:32
Part of the reason I wanted to do this video, I'm very open about,
16:35
you know, where I stand uh financially and like just in life.
16:39
I'm, you know, again,
16:40
31 and nowhere near like reaching these milestones
16:46
that traditionally in adulthood you would reach.
16:48
And I I feel no shame in that personally,
16:50
but I don't really want to live a life constantly in debt
16:55
and certainly not for appearances like
16:59
that.
17:02
Even though my debt situation is like on the more extreme side, perhaps,
17:07
I stand with many millennials in
17:09
that like I've resigned myself
17:11
that I may never own a home.
17:12
I probably won't.
17:13
With this situation, I'm even going back
17:15
and forth on like whether
17:16
or not I'll even afford to have kids cuz like I do I want
17:18
to have kids if I can't have a house,
17:20
if I'm constantly going to be, you know,
17:21
like moving when the landlord raises the rent or something like that.
17:23
Like it has impacted my long-term financial goals in
17:27
that I just find it really difficult to like plan long-term my life uh
17:34
in terms of like the big milestones.
17:35
Having a house, having kids,
17:37
all that kinds of stuff just feels like not possible with this much debt
17:43
and,
17:44
you know, like the the number,
17:46
at least in my head for me is is
17:48
so is large enough
17:49
that it's like,
17:49
"Well, at the very least it's going to take me five years, maybe,
17:53
to like maybe longer, but to pay all of this off.
17:56
And by the time I'm debt-free
17:58
and finally in a position where like maybe I can entertain those things,
18:01
I'm 31.
18:02
I'm going to be 36.
18:04
Uh I also, like I said,
18:05
I live in a very high cost of living area where I just I
18:09
don't know if it's feasible.
18:11
It's The biggest impact more is just it changes the trajectory of how my
18:16
life is going to pan out
18:17
because I think if I didn't have this debt,
18:18
I would be more I would be in a much better position to actually
18:22
be saving up for a house
18:23
or saving up for kids
18:24
if those were things I decided I wanted to do.
18:26
But now that I have this,
18:28
it feels like almost the decision is made
18:31
or it's like heavily skewed towards one direction of like,
18:35
"Well, if I want to still achieve my like adult, you know,
18:38
dreams of traveling and, you know, going out, just having like fun experiences,
18:45
I I have to choose either or, basically.
18:47
Like that's the biggest impact is it it really narrows down the options I
18:52
feel like I have in life."
18:56
At least for me,
18:57
I grew up with an idea of what I thought my life would be
19:00
like,
19:01
you know?
19:02
>> >> I thought it was a given
19:04
that I would get a house
19:06
and have kids and like kind of white picket fence American dream the whole
19:09
shebang.
19:09
And when I kind of like
19:10
when I realized it's not actually feasible for me,
19:14
there probably was a small period of grief.
19:17
I am generally a very optimistic person,
19:21
so I don't like to focus on the negative and what I'm losing.
19:25
I focus a lot on, "Well, if I don't have those things,
19:29
what possibilities open up to me?"
19:32
Uh and that gives me a lot of strength because, you know,
19:35
I may never own a home, sure,
19:37
but that maybe that just means I can travel more.
19:39
Maybe I can, you know, do more community might like community things.
19:44
I can spend more on family and be more generous with friends.
19:47
I can do other things that bring me joy.
19:50
Like I don't know.
19:51
I I don't find it particularly sad anymore cuz I don't think it has
19:55
to be.
19:56
Financial freedom looks different for everyone
19:58
and I think freedom for me comes out to like really spending money in
20:04
a way that makes me happy,
20:06
that aligns with me and with my goals and you know,
20:10
there's a part that of like the door is not totally closed,
20:15
but I'll be happy either way.
20:17
I don't know.
20:17
I just I it's very easy for me to see the paths in
20:20
which I can be happy regardless of
20:22
if I have those things
20:23
or not.
20:26
My money situation never really affected my friends.
20:31
I never really let it.
20:32
I am a generous person
20:34
or like that's at least a part of myself
20:36
that I feel very strongly.
20:37
I want to be a generous person
20:39
and so I act in such a way sometimes to my own detriment.
20:43
Like I will put things on a credit card to get the gift
20:46
that I know my BFF really wants
20:47
because that brings me joy even
20:50
if it technically like hurts me a little bit in the process.
20:53
I have a partner who I have been with since I was 16
20:57
and he and I are complete opposites in terms of like the financial spectrum.
21:02
I'm obviously an emotional spender and I'm like very oh my god,
21:06
let's do the thing.
21:07
Like who cares?
21:08
Money come like I make money.
21:10
It comes in every month.
21:11
It's fine.
21:12
Whereas he is like no, he want he's like a fire person.
21:16
He wants to retire early.
21:18
He's like he you know,
21:19
I live in the Bay Area like in Silicon Valley.
21:21
So we were talking about our childhoods
21:23
and and talking about our parents
21:24
and kind of like how those times were
21:27
and how they changed
21:28
and like how those finances affected our lives.
21:31
Money came up.
21:32
One of his parents didn't land in a financial place after the divorce
21:36
that they were really comfortable with
21:37
and so that led to a lot of verbage for him about how he
21:41
should be with money,
21:42
which was very different from how I learned I should be with money.
21:45
It eventually got to a point in our relationship, especially after COVID.
21:50
We had moved in together.
21:51
One of the biggest things
21:52
that kind of woke me up in terms of like I've always passively kind
21:58
of,
21:58
you know, I watch TFD
22:00
and I have read like Beyond Getting By
22:02
and things like I I have a general knowledge of like okay,
22:06
I should maybe do this with money
22:08
and I should be a little bit better
22:09
and I'm making like progress.
22:11
For the longest time it was like snail progress.
22:13
Like slowly chilling.
22:16
There's no rush, whatever, but my for my partner,
22:18
it affected our relationship in
22:20
that eventually we got to a point where he was like I I need
22:23
you to take this seriously.
22:24
And that's when I really started to take it more seriously.
22:27
It's why I consolidated all my credit cards into loans
22:30
that are easier to pay off,
22:31
things like that.
22:31
We came up with this idea together of like we're going to do this
22:34
debt first and then this debt
22:35
and then this debt.
22:35
That's probably the the biggest impact for sure
22:39
that it's had in my personal relationships.
22:41
I think the conversation started like we didn't outright decide to talk about money.
22:46
We kind of realized
22:47
that our values are not entirely different in terms of the kind of life
22:51
we would like to have,
22:53
but how soon that needs to come was different.
22:56
It was a process.
22:57
He wanted this future much sooner than I really was thinking about it
23:01
and that really sped up the conversations of like we had plenty of fights
23:05
about it.
23:05
This was like over I would say years.
23:08
We would watch sometimes TFD videos together.
23:11
He would show me a podcast like a financial podcast.
23:13
We had to consciously both for us approach like I had to listen to
23:19
his side and how he viewed things
23:21
and he had to listen to my side
23:23
and how I viewed things
23:24
and how I viewed spending money
23:26
because for the longest time
23:28
and even still a little bit to this day saving can sometimes feel like
23:32
deprivation,
23:33
you know, like if he wants me to save this amount of money
23:36
and he's like oh,
23:37
just cut, you know, your YouTube subscription or cut your this subscription, whatever.
23:42
It feels like I'm taking a a source of joy out of my life
23:46
and that feels like deprivation
23:47
and I had to really get him to understand
23:49
that because for him not buying those things is
23:51
so easy.
23:52
So it was just a lot of like over
23:54
and over back and forth conversations of like okay,
23:57
I'm going to hear you out.
23:58
You need to hear me out.
23:59
And eventually we reached the point where like I think I really understand where
24:03
he's coming from now.
24:04
He really understands where I'm coming from
24:05
and there's like a lot of empathy on both sides.
24:08
But it didn't start out that way.
24:09
It is a process.
24:10
It is difficult and you have to both really be open to listening to
24:14
the other person,
24:15
I I would say.
24:16
Cuz I I luckily I've always been a very open-minded person.
24:19
I've never had the mentality of like no,
24:21
I'm for sure right and you're wrong.
24:22
You should spend more money if actually.
24:23
That was never me.
24:26
>> >> Changes I'm making.
24:28
There's mainly two big ones.
24:30
One is you have to address the problem at the root.
24:34
So seeing as I'm somebody who is very susceptible to like FOMO
24:39
and YOLO stuff of like you only live once
24:42
and this is going to be limited edition gone in like a year.
24:45
It part of my brain wants to get it and have it, you know.
24:49
And I have to like fix that.
24:50
So one way that I do that is honestly just investing like the hobbies.
24:54
I took up sewing last year in 2025
24:58
and I've also taken up like needle felting
25:00
and like crochet like just making things
25:02
because I will say especially with sewing
25:05
because my problem area tends to be fashion
25:07
and clothing.
25:08
It has been phenomenally helpful to see something
25:13
that I want and especially now I will say this is like a slight
25:17
tangent,
25:18
but the fact that clothing nowadays is made
25:21
so much more terribly than it used to be.
25:25
Has radicalized me.
25:26
I spent last year about $300 on this beautiful raincoat
25:30
that I love that is like from some big designer
25:32
that is supposed to be really high quality
25:34
and I get it in the mail
25:36
and the now that I know sewing like the binding on the inside is
25:40
of the most like
25:42
if picture one ply toilet paper in a public bathroom,
25:45
that's what it feels like.
25:46
That's the fabric that they used to line the inside of the seams of
25:50
this jacket and it's scratchy
25:51
and I hate it
25:51
and I was like this is a $300 garment.
25:54
What do you mean that this is what you used?
25:56
That radicalized me and made me kind of like open my eyes to like
25:59
I literally I could have this item way nicer
26:03
and better if I just made it myself.
26:05
I am very much a beginner.
26:07
So I have basically started with like the first thing I ever made,
26:12
I made these cute little like linen dinner napkins,
26:16
which highly recommend if you're like into home decor
26:19
and you want to you know,
26:20
I a pair of like a full set of six linen napkins goes for
26:24
like $40 or something.
26:26
Like it's kind of a lot.
26:28
And I was able to get this linen fabric.
26:30
It was like a shirt
26:32
that I thrifted that I broke down into like little squares
26:35
and I made them
26:35
and like it's so scrunchy,
26:37
but like you can do it.
26:38
You know what I mean?
26:39
Like it's pretty cool.
26:40
I've also really gotten into just altering clothing
26:44
that I have rather than like going out
26:45
and buying a bunch of new stuff.
26:47
So an example would be this little shirt that I love.
26:50
I it's a graphic tee
26:51
that my favorite streamer wears
26:52
and I like to wear cuz he's from Arizona.
26:55
Um but I it was like it's a men's shirt.
26:57
So it was like way too long on me.
26:59
I'm like 5'3.
27:00
It was I was swimming in it
27:01
and I cropped it to literally the perfect length.
27:05
And when you look like you can't really tell it's homemade.
27:08
If you look at the back maybe you can kind of see,
27:13
>> >> but if you look really closely especially when I wear it,
27:15
like it's not obvious and I have worn this shirt so much since then.
27:19
Um I have here on my mannequins like this one is a jumpsuit
27:26
that I cropped.
27:28
You can't super see, but I'm in the process of cropping this one.
27:31
This is on my dress form.
27:33
But like I have the pins there
27:34
and I highly recommend like I feel like a tailor.
27:38
It's so good and it's saving me so much money.
27:42
>> >> And it's been really beneficial
27:43
because it like puts me out there in the world.
27:45
I go to like a sewing lab
27:47
that my local library has
27:49
and I rent like a machine from them
27:51
and I've met people who are into sewing
27:52
and like I've made friends
27:53
that way.
27:53
It's been like very good in a multitude of ways,
27:56
but like one huge thing is investing in hobbies.
28:00
Another thing and this is huge in terms of like managing my money consciously.
28:05
I really really really at least for me believe you have to keep my
28:09
like your your money situation front
28:11
and center.
28:11
The only way that I can really like keep a handle on my money
28:16
is doing the tedious thing of every single time I spend money,
28:20
I write it down.
28:22
I log it.
28:22
Whether that could be in a spreadsheet for other people,
28:24
that could be for me it's like physically in my book.
28:27
I have I got of course this was years ago,
28:29
but I I got this like cute little notebook
28:33
that is for money management
28:35
and I've been they have like an expense tracker built into it.
28:38
And so I just every single time I spend money, I log it.
28:41
I log what it is.
28:41
I log how much I spent.
28:43
This is for February.
28:43
This is for March and at the end of the month I total it.
28:47
And the first time I did that,
28:48
which was last year it was mind-boggling to me
28:51
because if you would ask me point-blank like oh,
28:54
how much do you think that you spent on like disposable, you know,
28:56
kind of like fun money stuff.
28:58
I would have been like $200 maybe, 300.
29:01
And then I calculated at the end of the month
29:03
and literally it was like double.
29:04
It was like $600 cuz it's like $40 here, $20 here, 15 there.
29:08
Little Amazon purchases of like oh, I need this thing.
29:11
You know, it it adds up so quickly.
29:14
So me logging it
29:16
and also just keeping kind of a running total going physically where I have
29:20
to I don't forget anything.
29:22
>> >> Um keeps me on track because if I set a budget of like okay,
29:26
literally I only want to spend $300 in like fun going out things with
29:31
friends maybe or like take out.
29:32
I approach that usually I by like the second week of the month.
29:37
Then I realize wow.
29:39
Okay, so I just now like I'm done for the rest of the month
29:42
and it just it keeps it
29:43
so front of mind.
29:44
That has been like the hugest game changer
29:46
and really the only way
29:49
that I can stick to my budget.
29:51
Cuz if I don't do that,
29:52
I have done test months where I don't do that cuz I'm like, "Oh,
29:55
I have a handle on it.
29:56
I'll do better."
29:57
I still end up going over budget and I spend like $400 or $500.
30:00
And I don't, you know, I I laid down my budget earlier.
30:02
I don't have that much wiggle room.
30:04
So, it's like I really That's really what I have to do to stay
30:07
on top of it.
30:10
The biggest money lessons that I've learned from this whole journey,
30:14
which is going on I think a decade now of trying to get better
30:19
with debt and have a better relationship with money,
30:21
is really, at least for me, buying is not becoming.
30:26
That is number one.
30:27
I am very much the person
30:28
that like will try to buy my way into a hobby
30:32
or into a community.
30:33
I have so many cute workout outfits
30:35
that I don't wear
30:36
because I don't go to the gym like
30:37
that.
30:37
But like I figured I was like, "Oh, if I have these,
30:41
then like when I eventually go, like I'll I'll look like I belong there."
30:45
You know what I mean?
30:46
But I have to remind myself, lesson number one, buying is not becoming.
30:49
Do not confuse the two.
30:51
Only buy what you actually use.
30:54
And I guess this is like the second thing of don't buy for your
30:56
fantasy self.
30:58
Cuz that is a huge one for me.
30:59
I have to realistically look at what my life is
31:02
and look at how I live day-to-day
31:04
and see if the thing
31:05
that I want actually aligns with this.
31:07
And if it doesn't,
31:08
if it's let's say I want to start a new hobby
31:10
that I don't actually do,
31:11
but there's an upfront cost,
31:12
really you have to like look into either borrowing from a friend
31:17
or renting it and like you have to do the hobby first.
31:20
And then see if it's worth buying the stuff.
31:22
That's key.
31:23
I cannot stress enough.
31:25
But that's probably the the second lesson.
31:27
And then like the final one, they're all kind of tangentially related.
31:30
But happiness, at least for me, comes from doing and not consuming,
31:34
like not buying.
31:35
I have bought so many things. genuinely,
31:39
I lived one of the apartments I lived in once with my partner
31:42
that had three closets
31:43
and they were awful.
31:44
And I still was buying more.
31:46
Like I I can tell you from experience, buying things doesn't bring happiness,
31:50
no matter what it is.
31:52
Rather than focus on consumption, which I know social media, but tangential thing,
32:00
I went off of social media
32:01
because the ads on social media really make this difficult.
32:04
I implore anybody who's in a similar situation to me to like take a
32:08
break from social media
32:10
and see how it feels.
32:11
You know, when you kind of like unplug,
32:13
I feel very much like the Matrix.
32:14
You get out of
32:15
that mindset and just I wake up every day
32:19
and I tell myself like I'm just not going to buy anything today.
32:21
I'm not going to buy anything I don't absolutely need today.
32:24
And I do that every day.
32:26
>> >> And it works most of the time
32:28
because I it feels at least
32:31
that feels very manageable.
32:32
If I want something or I want to like I want to feel something,
32:36
I have to do a thing rather than buy a thing.
32:39
Those are like I think the biggest lessons I've learned.
32:43
It's just They're all kind of emotional because at least for me,
32:46
I'm an emotional spender.
32:47
So, they're rooted in those things,
32:48
but if there's anybody else that is like me,
32:51
those are like the biggest lessons that I've learned.
32:54
And like try to learn from me.
32:56
Don't don't get in debt like me.
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