0:00 Have you guys seen Monica?
0:01 >> Uh, actually I think she went to the salon.
0:03 >> Oh, yeah.
0:03 Oh, she went to the salon.
0:04 All right, check it out.
0:09 >> Whose day JUST GOT BETTER?
0:16 CHANDLER.
0:16 >> HEY.
0:17 AH.
0:20 >> What do you think?
0:21 >> I think I think I can see your scalp.
0:25 >> Don't you just love it?
0:27 >> Yeah.
0:28 Yeah.
0:28 You You got shellfish in your head.
0:31 >> It's uh It's something.
0:33 You go, girlfriend.
0:36 >> You never said that in your life, have you?
0:38 >> Not once.
0:38 >> I thought so.
0:40 >> And listen to this.
0:46 >> What do you know?
0:47 It's a treat for the eyes and the ears.
0:53 >> I can't wait for everyone at work to see these.
0:56 Ow.
0:59 You go back to work tomorrow night, right?
1:01 >> Yeah.
1:01 >> So, if you want people to see them, then by definition,
1:03 you're not having them taken out, say, at the break of dawn.
1:07 >> Well, if I had them taken out,
1:09 then I wouldn't be able to do this.
1:17 >> You like that, right?
1:27 What are you singing?
1:28 >> It's Valero from Tin.
1:30 >> It's Ride of the Valkyries from Apocalypse Now.
1:34 See, here's the thing.
1:35 The cornrows are really a solution to your frizzy hair problem.
1:38 And now that we're home, you don't have that problem anymore.
1:40 So, if you think about it, I hate them.
1:45 >> What?
1:46 You said you like them.
1:47 >> Did I?
1:48 Let's refresh.
1:49 I believe what I said was that I could see your scalp.
1:53 Well, fine.
1:54 So, you don't like them?
1:55 Everybody else does >> again.
1:58 Let's journey back.
2:00 >> As I recall, what Rachel said was she had never noticed the shape
2:03 of your skull before.
2:05 And Joey, well, Joey didn't realize it was anything different.
2:10 >> You know what?
2:11 I don't care.
2:12 I like it like this.
2:13 And And I'm going to keep it.
2:14 You're just jealous because your hair can't do this.
2:18 Ow.
2:21 Get yourself in the tooth >> and the eye.
2:28 >> Honey, you've been in there for a long time.
2:30 Is everything okay?
2:32 >> Not really.
2:37 I have a problem.
2:41 >> Really?
2:41 What happened?
2:43 Well, I was dancing around
2:45 and singing No Woman No Cry
2:48 and uh I got stuck.
2:53 >> You can't move at all.
2:54 >> Oh, I can move.
3:02 >> If I untangle you, will you please get rid of the cornrows?
3:05 >> I guess so.
3:09 >> Some of these look a little frayed.
3:11 Yeah, I I tried to gnaw myself free.
3:17 >> Hello, Mr.
3:18 Hickles.
3:20 >> You're doing it again.
3:22 >> We're not doing anything.
3:23 >> You're stomping.
3:24 It's disturbing my birds.
3:28 >> You don't have birds.
3:31 >> I could have birds.
3:34 >> Okay, Mr.
3:34 Hackles.
3:35 We'll try to keep it down.
3:36 >> Thank you.
3:37 I'm going to rejoin my dinner party.
3:41 All right.
3:41 Bye-bye.
3:41 >> Okay.
3:44 Janice.
3:45 Janice.
3:46 You got to give me Janice.
3:47 That wasn't about being picky.
3:49 >> Yeah, >> we'll give you Janice.
3:50 >> I miss Janice, though.
3:52 >> Hello, Chandler.
3:54 Bang.
3:57 >> Oh my god.
4:00 >> Oh, Chandela.
4:02 Now, that's it. there.
4:09 Faster.
4:18 >> Stop with the broom.
4:19 We're not making noise.
4:32 >> We won.
4:33 >> We do.
4:38 Oh, >> Mr.
4:38 Heckles.
4:43 >> How did this happen?
4:45 >> He must have been sweeping.
4:46 They found a broom in his hand.
4:52 >> That's terrible.
4:53 >> I know.
4:54 I was sweeping yesterday.
4:56 Could have been me.
4:59 >> You were sleeping.
5:01 >> You never know.
5:02 >> Never know.
5:04 >> Monica.
5:04 Monica.
5:05 Look at this lamp.
5:06 Is this tacky or what?
5:07 We have to have this, >> Ra.
5:10 I think we have enough regular lamps.
5:12 >> What?
5:12 Oh, come on.
5:13 I mean, it's it's not like it's not like I'm asking for this girly
5:16 clock or anything,
5:17 which by the way, I also think is really cool.
5:22 >> It doesn't go with any of my stuff.
5:24 >> Well, what about my stuff?
5:27 >> You don't have any stuff.
5:30 >> You still think of it as your apartment, don't you?
5:34 No.
5:34 >> Yes, you do.
5:36 You think of it
5:36 as your apartment and I'm just someone who rents a room.
5:42 >> Okay.
5:42 While you m on that for a while,
5:44 I'm going to go find a place for my new land.
5:54 >> Hey, Ra.
5:55 >> You know what we hadn't played in a while?
5:57 >> What?
5:57 >> Hide the lamp.
6:01 Monica, let it go.
6:04 >> Did you know I was allergic to shellfish?
6:06 Well, then you'll just have to eat the other lamps.
6:20 Okay.
6:20 All right.
6:21 It was an accident.
6:22 I swear.
6:23 All right.
6:23 I I was I WAS PUTTING ON MY JACKET
6:24 and and the thing
6:25 and and the and the lamp
6:26 and it broke.
6:27 >> Oh, please, Monica.
6:29 You've always hated my loop
6:30 and now all of a sudden it's just magically it's just broken.
6:35 >> Phoebe, tell her.
6:37 >> Okay.
6:37 I didn't see it cuz I was putting on my jacket,
6:40 but um I want to believe you.
6:43 >> Are you under the sheet?
6:48 >> Yes.
6:48 >> Great.
6:49 Let's begin.
6:59 How's the pressure?
7:02 It's nice.
7:03 >> Well, Phoebe, you are good.
7:06 >> Stating the obvious, but thank you.
7:08 And it's not weird, is it?
7:15 >> No.
7:15 Oh, >> that's right.
7:15 You just enjoy.
7:20 >> Oh.
7:27 Oh, yeah.
7:32 Oh.
7:36 Oh.
7:36 Oh, yeah.
7:36 Okay.
7:36 Oh, God.
7:36 Phoebe.
7:36 Oh, that's it.
7:37 THAT'S IT RIGHT THERE.
7:39 OH.
7:45 SO, what do you what do you want to do?
7:46 Let's do something crazy.
7:49 >> I know.
7:49 Let's rest and drink lots of fluids.
7:53 >> >> Okay, I'll rest.
7:54 But you know, if I'm going to bed, then you're coming with me.
8:01 >> See, that would be impossible to resist if you weren't all drippy here.
8:08 >> Are you saying that you don't want to get with this?
8:17 >> Yeah, I don't think you should say that even when you're healthy.
8:23 Come on.
8:27 >> Don't take this personally, okay?
8:28 It's just that I just can't have sex with a sick person now.
8:32 >> I'm with you, Chandler.
8:34 I mean, I can't have sex with a sick person either.
8:36 That's disgusting.
8:37 But I'm not sick.
8:39 Let me prove it to you.
8:41 We are two healthy people and the bribe of live.
8:48 >> See, that's the thing.
8:49 I would like to stay in the priv.
8:58 >> Oh, what is it, honey?
8:59 You need some tea?
9:00 Some soup?
9:07 >> Calling Dr.
9:08 Big.
9:09 Dr.
9:10 Big to the bed.
9:13 >> Oh, jeez.
9:14 Honey, I thought I thought you were asleep.
9:16 >> How can I be asleep?
9:18 Oh, you were the next room.
9:22 >> I was asleep.
9:28 >> Oh, no, no, no.
9:29 Honey, you know what's sexy?
9:30 Layers.
9:32 >> Layers are sexy.
9:34 And blankets are sexy.
9:35 And oh, hot water bottles are sexy.
9:38 >> Come on, get it to bed.
9:39 I want to prove to you that I'm not sick.
9:40 I want to make you feel as good as I feel.
9:44 Action.
9:46 >> Please get some rest.
9:48 >> I'm fine.
9:56 >> Oh my god.
9:57 You still have the chipper.
9:59 >> The what?
10:00 >> That's what we used to call your uh your motorcycle in high school.
10:04 >> You know, a motorcycle is a chopper and your chip.
10:09 Never mind.
10:11 >> I think it's cute.
10:18 Wow.
10:18 Lipper from the chipper.
10:22 >> So, you still in touch with anyone from high school?
10:24 >> Um, there's Rachel and um I think that's it.
10:29 >> How about you?
10:30 >> Oh, yeah.
10:30 I still hang with Simmons and Zana, you know,
10:32 and I see Spindler a lot
10:34 and a Kelly and I run into goalie from time to time.
10:38 Stick Browns, Zoff, Magguire, JT, Beersley.
10:43 >> Is that all?
10:44 >> Ah, you know, after high school, you just kind of lose touch.
10:49 >> Oh, yeah.
10:49 I ran into Richard Dorfman.
10:51 >> Oh, how is he?
10:52 >> Not so good.
10:52 Me and Simmons gave him a wedgie.
10:56 >> Isn't he an architect now?
10:58 >> Yeah, they still wear underwear.
11:00 >> It can happen on anniversary ever.
11:02 >> Oh, good.
11:02 All right.
11:03 You decided to tell them about the Richard.
11:09 >> >> What?
11:09 What Richard thinks?
11:11 >> Oh, no.
11:14 >> What Richard think?
11:15 >> Simmons.
11:16 Go with Simmons.
11:23 >> Okay.
11:23 I um I ran into Richard yesterday
11:26 and he asked me
11:27 if I wanted to go for a bite
11:29 and I did.
11:30 And the only reason why I didn't tell you is
11:31 because I I knew you'd get mad
11:33 and I didn't want to spoil our anniversary.
11:36 I'm not mad >> really.
11:41 >> Oh, yeah.
11:42 Yeah.
11:42 So, you you bumped into Richard.
11:44 You grabbed a bite.
11:48 >> No big deal.
11:58 >> Great.
11:58 >> Okay.
11:58 London won.
12:00 >> You already had it.
12:01 >> Yeah.
12:02 Well, we called everyone in your phone book and a bunch of people came,
12:05 but it took us
12:06 so long to get you here
12:07 that they they had to leave.
12:09 >> We wanted to throw you a big surprise
12:11 and a great shower
12:13 and and now you don't have either.
12:16 >> We ruined everything.
12:17 >> Well, no, wait a minute.
12:18 That's not true.
12:20 No, what you did
12:20 that was really sweet
12:22 and it kind of works out for the best.
12:25 >> What do you What do you mean?
12:26 >> Well, now I get to spend my shower with the only people I
12:29 really love.
12:31 I mean, and I get all those presents without having to talk to a
12:34 bunch of people I don't even like.
12:41 >> Oh, so surprise, Monica.
12:44 >> Popular Phoebe in tennis is called the overhand Phoebe.
12:48 And if you win, you must slap your opponent on the Phoebe and say,
12:51 "Hi, Phoebe."
12:53 >> Oh, that's cute.
12:54 We really all enjoyed it.
12:56 But, you know, it doesn't count.
12:58 >> Count for what?
12:59 just count in our heads as good mad libs.
13:04 >> I guess fun time's over.
13:06 >> But wait, wait, guys.
13:07 If we follow the rules, it's still fun and it means something.
13:12 >> I'm going to take off.
13:13 >> Guys, rules are good.
13:15 Rules help control the fun.
13:18 >> To record a message, begin speaking at the dorm.
13:23 >> Hi, uh, Richard, it's Monica.
13:25 Um, listen, I I did something kind of crazy tonight.
13:28 Um, maybe I'm getting my period or something.
13:30 I don't know.
13:32 Um, anyway, uh, I I I beeped into your machine
13:35 and I heard this message
13:36 that that freaked me out.
13:37 And, um, you know what?
13:39 U Michelle will tell you the rest.
13:40 I I I'm I'm sorry.
13:42 Okay.
13:42 And I hope that we can just forget the whole thing.
13:45 Okay.
13:45 Bye.
13:49 >> Your outgoing message has now been changed.
13:54 >> Outgoing.
13:55 Did that say outgoing?
13:56 not outgoing.
14:01 >> Hi, uh, Richard, it's Monica.
14:02 Um, listen, I I did something kind of crazy tonight.
14:05 Um, maybe I'm getting my period or something.
14:07 I DON'T KNOW.
14:09 >> WELL, HOW DID YOU DO THAT?
14:10 >> I don't know.
14:16 >> Goodbye.
14:16 >> No.
14:16 >> Uh, listen.
14:17 Um, as long as we're telling stuff, uh, I have another one for you.
14:25 I'm a little younger than I said.
14:30 >> You're not a senior.
14:31 >> Oh, I'm a senior >> in high school.
14:50 Okay.
14:50 What we did?
14:51 What's wrong?
14:52 Oh god, I just had sex with someone who wasn't alive during the bsentennial.
14:58 >> I just had sex.
15:03 >> Ethan, focus.
15:05 How could you not tell me?
15:06 >> Well, you never told me how old you were.
15:08 >> Well, that's different.
15:09 My lie didn't make one of us a felon in 48 states.
15:14 What were you thinking?
15:15 >> I wasn't thinking.
15:16 I was too busy falling.
15:18 >> Don't say it.
15:19 >> In love with you.
15:26 Really?
15:26 >> Sorry.
15:26 >> We'll fall out of it.
15:27 You know, you shouldn't even be here.
15:28 It's a school night.
15:33 >> Oh god.
15:34 Oh god.
15:35 I'm like those women that you you see with shiny guys named Chad.
15:43 I'm Joan Collins.
15:52 >> Who?
15:52 All right.
15:52 So, give me your phone here and now your cell.
16:14 Okay.
16:14 This is your cell phone.
16:17 Yes.
16:18 This is your current cell phone.
16:22 >> Yes.
16:23 It reminds me of a simpler time.
16:27 >> Phoebe, where's your purse?
16:32 >> Hey, no.
16:33 No.
16:33 Give it to me.
16:34 >> You can't have it.
16:35 GIVE IT TO ME.
16:40 >> NO.
16:40 >> I'll go in there.
16:41 >> Oh, yeah.
16:42 >> Phoei, come here.
16:42 >> No.
16:43 GIVE IT TO ME.
16:44 >> You're It's w Damn you, Monica Geller.
16:51 Hyphen Bing.
16:53 >> Sophiti, why are there men's shoes by the door?
16:57 >> Those are my shoes.
16:59 >> Oh, when you get over this breakup, we need to go shopping.
17:04 >> Look, Monica, I really appreciate you checking in on me,
17:07 but I'm actually feeling a lot better.
17:09 You are?
17:09 >> Yeah.
17:10 And I I just kind of want to be alone right now.
17:14 >> Who's that?
17:16 I ordered Chinese food.
17:21 What are the chances?
17:24 1 billion Chinese people.
17:26 And they said, "Mike, >> what are you doing here?"
17:31 >> Phoebe called me.
17:32 >> Phoebe, I'm sorry.
17:34 I broke down.
17:35 I wanted to see him.
17:36 >> Damn it, Phoebe.
17:37 How did you even call him?
17:38 >> There's a speaker phone on the base unit.
17:42 >> Base unit?
17:42 Think, Monica.
17:43 Think.
17:44 Look, if I want to see Phoebe and she wants to see me,
17:46 >> this doesn't concern you.
17:49 >> Sorry.
17:50 I guess I was thrown off by the mention of my name.
17:54 >> Look, guys, you can't do this.
17:57 It's just going to make getting over each other that much harder.
17:59 >> Not if nothing happens.
18:00 Why can't Why can't we just hang out as friends?
18:05 >> Sure.
18:06 I'm just going to hang out as friends.
18:07 Then then maybe I'll join you.
18:08 You know, I'm your friend and I'm Mike's friend.
18:15 Sit down.
18:19 >> Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
18:20 Make room for your friend.
18:33 >> So, how have you been?
18:34 >> I've been pretty good.
18:36 >> I ask you to get back together because I know we want different things,
18:38 but just to be with you one more night.
18:41 >> I know.
18:41 I want that, too.
18:42 But is that going to make it too hard?
18:44 >> It can't be any harder than this.
18:46 I mean, if I had known the last time I saw you would be
18:48 the last time I I would have stopped to memorize your face,
18:53 the way you moved, everything about you.
18:56 If I had known the last time I kissed you would be the last
18:59 time.
19:01 I never would have stopped.
19:04 >> Kiss him, you fool.
19:08 >> What?
19:08 Didn't you hear that speech?
19:10 If you don't kiss him, then I will.
19:16 >> What?
19:16 >> I knew you'd be here.
19:18 >> A crap.
19:21 >> Who is this?
19:22 >> It's my friend Manny.
19:24 I asked him to keep me away from you.
19:28 >> Hey, that's what I'm doing for Phoebe.
19:30 >> Well, you're not doing a very good job.
19:36 >> She sent the chicken back again.
19:38 She said it's too dry now
19:39 and she wants to come back here
19:40 and explain to you exactly how she wants it.
19:43 >> Well, fine.
19:43 I'd like to meet this chicken expert.
19:45 Send the colonel in.
19:52 >> Oh my god.
19:58 Lucky bastard.
20:01 >> Janice, how are you?
20:03 Miss Hot Shot Chef at the big fancy restaurant with the best chicken ever.
20:11 >> I'm fine.
20:13 >> Oh, what is that on your finger?
20:15 I'm blind.
20:18 >> Um, so who's the lucky guy?
20:25 >> Oh my god, I am so sorry, sweetie.
20:31 Are you okay?
20:34 You didn't tell her we're getting married, did you?
20:36 >> Well, she saw the ring.
20:37 >> Did she freak out?
20:39 >> Well, she was shocked when I told her, but then again,
20:41 so were most people.
20:44 >> Well, she actually has a boyfriend, you know, herself.
20:47 Name's Clark.
20:48 Uh, she also kind of invited herself to her wedding.
20:52 Clark, too.
20:55 >> You said no, right?
20:58 >> Huh?
21:01 You said no, right?
21:03 >> Well, she cornered me and she asked me if the wedding was in town.
21:06 I mean, what was I supposed to do?
21:10 >> Why?
21:10 >> How odd is that?
21:11 Your checks in the mail.
21:12 Oh, your baby is so cute.
21:14 I I can't wait to read your book, Ross.
21:20 >> Come on.
21:21 So, she comes to the wedding.
21:22 Maybe it won't be so bad.
21:24 >> What?
21:24 Do you think she's just going to sit there quietly?
21:26 You don't think she's going to want to make a toast?
21:28 You don't think she's going to want to grab the microphone
21:30 and sing part-time lover?
21:32 >> Oh my god.
21:33 She's not going to like the chicken that night, either, is she?
21:39 >> You know what?
21:41 It's going to be okay.
21:41 You know what?
21:42 She's probably not going to even want to come.
21:45 >> Really?
21:45 >> No, that was a lie.
21:48 See how easy that was?
21:51 >> So So you would have just lied?
21:54 >> Yes.
21:55 Want it really been that easy?
22:00 >> Yes.
22:00 >> Good.
22:00 So, do it Saturday night cuz we're going to dinner with her and Clark.
22:06 >> Hi again.
22:16 >> Hey.
22:16 >> Hey.
22:16 >> Thank you so much.
22:17 >> Oh, don't thank me.
22:18 Thank the jerk that never showed up.
22:21 Okay, I got to get to work.
22:24 You want some help with that?
22:25 >> Oh, no thanks.
22:26 I got it.
22:27 Oh, no I don't.
22:33 >> Whoa.
22:33 You >> okay?
22:33 >> Yeah.
22:33 >> Stood up too fast.
22:33 Got a little head rush.
22:36 >> The heat >> and and the humidity.
22:45 >> That's a uh that's a tough combination.
22:53 Do you want to come in for some lemonade?
22:56 >> Like you wouldn't believe.
23:03 >> Wow, this is a great place.
23:08 >> Thank you.
23:10 >> Just make yourself comfortable.
23:17 >> Gotcha.
23:17 So, this place is really my grandmother's.
23:23 >> >> I got it from her when she moved to Florida.
23:25 Otherwise, I could never afford a place like this.
23:32 >> So, if the landlord ever asks,
23:34 I'm an 87year-old woman who's afraid of her VCR.
23:37 You thirsty?
23:38 >> Oh, you bet I am.
23:42 >> Okay, here's your penis.
23:49 >> >> Oh my god.
23:50 What the hell are you doing?
23:53 >> You said you want to come in for some lemonade.
23:59 >> So, were you just going to give me lemonade?
24:02 >> Yeah.
24:02 >> Cover yourself up.
24:04 >> Oh, right.
24:05 Sorry.
24:06 >> I don't believe this.
24:07 I mean, someone asked you in for lemonade
24:09 and to you that means they want to have sex.
24:11 >> Um, usually.
24:12 Yeah.
24:13 Well, not just lemonade, iced tea, sometimes juice.
24:18 Look, sorry.
24:20 I just thought you liked me.
24:23 Such a jerk.
24:27 It's okay.
24:29 I suppose it could happen to anyone.
24:32 Not anyone I know, but by the way, I can still see it.
24:43 MONICA I FIRED YOU.
24:46 >> WHAT?
24:46 >> I'm I'm breaking up with you.
24:48 You're fired.
24:51 >> Why?
24:51 >> I'm sorry.
24:52 I'm just I'm I'm just not ready for a relationship right now.
24:56 >> Yeah.
24:56 And And I'm sorry, too, but Well,
24:59 I just I like things done a certain way,
25:01 and the chemistry is just not right.
25:03 >> Oh, that's good.
25:04 The chemistry thing for us, too.
25:09 >> Wow.
25:09 Um Okay.
25:10 Um, I I I I realize I came on a a little strong,
25:15 but it's only because I think you're so amazing.
25:19 And uh I I just want to I want to tell you how much
25:22 I appreciate you giving me an opportunity here
25:24 because I you're the most talented chef I've ever worked for.
25:37 >> Anyway, >> Tim, wait.
25:38 Yeah.
25:41 Um, I think I spoke too quickly.
25:43 There there's a learning curve with this job
25:45 and maybe we could try it again.
25:49 >> Really?
25:49 >> Yeah.
25:49 >> Thank you so much cuz I I know I can be better.
25:54 >> Okay.
25:54 And Tim, I just want to say good luck here.
25:58 >> What?
25:59 What are you doing?
26:01 >> Do you know what just happened?
26:04 >> Yeah, we we had sex and then we fell asleep.
26:10 >> >> No, we were in the middle of sex and you fell asleep.
26:18 >> No.
26:20 No, that's not true.
26:22 No.
26:22 Best time ever.
26:26 You rock my world.
26:33 >> Monica, >> what?
26:33 >> I was giving you some of my best moves and you missed it.
26:37 So, please wake up so we can do it right.
26:43 >> Okay.
26:44 Okay.
26:44 I'm ready.
26:46 Come on, big fella.
26:48 >> Give me the good stuff.
26:49 >> Yeah.
26:52 >> No, no, no.
26:53 Don't fall asleep.
26:56 >> Okay.
26:56 I'm going to make you some coffee.
27:01 Oh, I probably won't spill coffee grounds all over the kitchen floor.
27:06 >> Okay, I'm up.
27:06 I'm up.
27:07 >> Cab's ready.
27:08 >> All right, let's go.
27:10 >> You're welcome.
27:11 >> Oh, I'm sorry.
27:12 Were you speaking to me or were sleeping with someone else?
27:16 >> We were on a break.
27:17 >> You know, Ross, why don't you just put that on your answering machine?
27:21 >> Hey.
27:21 Hey, it's valid.
27:22 Okay.
27:22 And I'm not the only one who thinks so.
27:24 Monica agrees with me.
27:28 >> What?
27:28 I don't know.
27:31 >> That's what you said last night.
27:33 >> What I said was was
27:34 that I understood Joey is the one who agreed with you.
27:40 >> Okay.
27:40 >> Really, Joey?
27:43 >> What?
27:43 >> And and and you know, if I get really hot,
27:45 um I I like to pick up this knife
27:49 and and um I I put the the cold steel against um my body.
28:01 >> Are you all right?
28:04 I'm fine.
28:20 What do we got here?
28:21 20-year-old male.
28:22 He's got a severed toe on his right foot.
28:27 >> Could you please let DO THAT FEET FIRST?
28:29 YOU KNOW WHERE his injury is.
28:30 SEVERED TOE.
28:31 YOU JUST SAID IT. says here the knife went right through your shoe.
28:36 >> Of course it did.
28:37 They're made of wicker.
28:40 >> Did you bring the toe?
28:41 >> Oh, yes.
28:41 I have it right here on ice.
28:44 >> Don't worry, son.
28:45 We'll just reattach it.
28:46 And then >> what?
28:48 What is it?
28:49 >> You brought a carrot.
28:53 >> What?
28:54 This isn't your toe.
28:55 This is a small, very cold piece of carrot.
28:58 >> You brought a carrot?
29:01 Oh my god.
29:02 There's a toe in my kitchen.
29:04 >> You want to make it more interesting?
29:06 >> How much were you thinking?
29:07 >> 10 bucks a game.
29:08 >> Make it 50.
29:09 >> I'll make it a hundred.
29:11 >> 1,000.
29:11 >> Okay.
29:14 >> So, let's see who goes first.
29:15 Uh, you got a quarter.
29:17 >> No.
29:18 Either you girls got a quarter.
29:21 >> Honey, try to focus the trash talk on him.
29:25 >> Monica, you call it.
29:26 Heads.
29:26 No tails.
29:27 Heads.
29:28 Tails.
29:28 Oh, WHAT ARE THE CHANCES?
29:35 HA.
29:35 >> My point.
29:36 >> Oh, no.
29:36 I don't think so.
29:37 No.
29:37 According to standard table tennis rules,
29:39 if at any time a player uses his non-raet bearing hand to touch the
29:42 playing surface,
29:43 he or she forfeits the point.
29:49 >> Oh, I'm sorry.
29:51 I I think I think that may have missed the table.
29:54 >> Oh, do you?
29:55 Uh, yah.
29:56 >> Do you?
29:56 >> Uh, y >> do you?
29:57 >> Uh, yeah.
30:00 >> You really find this attractive on him?
30:02 >> Oh, yeah.
30:03 >> Are you telling me you're not even a little turned on by Monica
30:06 right now?
30:14 >> I think this is the first time in our marriage
30:16 that I felt like the more attractive one.
30:19 >> All right.
30:19 Come on, Mike.
30:20 You can beat her.
30:21 Knock that dog off her head.
30:27 Damn it.
30:27 I SLEEP WITH HIM.
30:32 >> Game point.
30:33 >> Don't get too cocky.
30:34 Remember, I won the last one.
30:36 Oh, by the way, how did that feel losing to a girl?
30:39 >> You know, you should really look in the mirror before you call yourself that.
30:46 >> No, no, no.
30:48 >> And that's how it's done.
30:51 >> Okie dokie.
30:52 You've each won a game
30:53 and I've lost what's felt like a year of my life.
30:56 >> So, everybody goes home a winner.
30:58 >> Best out of three.
30:59 >> That's what I'm thinking.
31:00 >> Should I use my invisibility to fight crime or for evil?
31:06 >> Serve the ball, chump.
31:08 >> You don't count.
31:09 >> Okay.
31:10 Better comebacks, Mike.
31:11 Better comebacks.
31:14 >> I can't just walk away.
31:15 I I put in four hours.
31:17 But look, you knew this about me when you married me.
31:20 You agreed to take me in sickness and in health.
31:23 Well, this is my sickness.
31:26 >> What about the obsessive cleaning?
31:28 >> That's just good sense.
31:37 >> You okay?
31:38 >> No, no, no, no, honey.
31:39 I'm okay.
31:39 I shake it off.
31:41 Oh god.
31:41 No shaking.
31:42 No shaking.
31:42 No shaking.
31:47 Oh my god.
31:49 I can't play.
31:50 >> So, you forfeit.
31:52 >> Mike wins.
31:54 I can't believe it.
31:56 I lost.
32:01 >> No, you didn't.
32:04 >> What?
32:04 >> Because I'm going to play for you.
32:06 >> You can't do that.
32:07 >> Ah, it's okay.
32:08 I don't care which of them I beat.
32:12 >> Okay.
32:12 We're taking that pedal home, mister.
32:19 >> >> You don't have to do this.
32:20 >> Yes, I do.
32:21 Now, I may not understand why you have to win so badly,
32:24 but if it's important to you,
32:26 then it's important to me because I love you.
32:30 >> But you suck.
32:34 >> You're welcome, sweetheart.
32:37 >> All right, Mike.
32:38 Let's get this over with.
32:39 Sudden death.
32:40 Whoever wins this point wins.
32:42 Okay.
32:47 Oh my god, you're good.
32:50 It's like watching porn.
32:58 >> And that's how it's done.
33:03 >> Oh my god.
33:04 Oh my god.
33:04 That was so amazing.
33:07 When did you Hold on.
33:09 I almost forgot.
33:15 LOSER.
33:15 >> >> WHEN DID YOU stop sucking?
33:17 >> I never sucked.
33:18 I just didn't want you to know how good I was.
33:21 >> Why?
33:21 >> I don't know.
33:22 >> Well, this is so great.
33:23 Now we can enter into doubles tournaments.
33:25 >> That's why.
33:25 >> There's no way I'm going to get a shot.
33:27 Maybe they can take the needle and squirt it into my mouth.
33:30 You know, like like a court gun.
33:33 >> Hello there.
33:34 >> Hi.
33:34 >> I'm Dr.
33:35 Carlin.
33:36 I see someone's having a little allergic reaction.
33:40 >> Doctor, can I see you for just a moment, please?
33:44 My brother um has a slight phobia about needles.
33:48 >> Did you tell him about my my squirt gun idea?
33:53 >> My brother, the PhD,
33:55 would like to know if there's any way to treat this orally?
33:58 >> No.
33:59 Under these circumstances, it has to be an injection
34:02 and it has to be now.
34:06 >> A good have seeds.
34:10 Um, doctor says it's got to be a needle.
34:12 So, you're just going to have to be brave.
34:13 Okay.
34:15 Can you do that for me?
34:19 >> Okay.
34:20 >> Okay.
34:20 Oh, boy.
34:20 You are doing so good.
34:24 >> Okay.
34:24 You want to squeeze my hand?
34:27 >> Yes.
34:27 >> Okay.
34:27 >> All right.
34:28 Ross, don't squeeze it so hard.
34:30 Honey, really don't SQUEEZE IT SO HARD.
34:33 >> MY HAND.
34:38 >> Are you sure he didn't break it?
34:39 because it really hurts.
34:40 >> No, it's just a good bone bruise.
34:43 And right here is the puncture wound from your ring.
34:49 >> I'm sorry.
34:50 I'm really sorry.
34:52 Sorry.
34:53 So, sorry.
34:54 Hey.
34:55 Hey.
34:55 I got my S's back.
34:58 >> Which we can celebrate later.
35:01 >> Monica, my star student.
35:03 You know, you called me that before.
35:04 So, I I took the liberty of fashioning a star out of aluminum foil.
35:08 No.
35:08 No pressure.
35:10 You like my cookies, you give me the star.
35:17 >> Wow, a star.
35:20 >> I know you all hate me and and I'm sorry, but I don't care.
35:25 Okay, Joey, you're up next.
35:30 >> Oh my god, this is amazing.
35:34 You get an A.
35:38 >> I got an A. in school.
35:39 Hey, I'm a dork.
35:42 >> Joey, I'm so proud of you.
35:44 >> I think you should give him your star.
35:46 Excuse me.
35:49 >> He doesn't even know what he's doing.
35:51 >> We're all beginners here.
35:52 Nobody knows what they're doing.
35:53 >> I do.
35:54 I'm a professional chef.
35:56 >> Oh, relax.
35:57 It's not a courtroom drama.
36:00 >> If you're a professional chef, what are you doing taking introduction to cooking?
36:06 >> YEAH, >> I'm I'm sorry.
36:07 It's just that um Well, I I cook at this restaurant, Allesandro,
36:10 and um I just got a really bad review.
36:12 >> Oh, Alessandro.
36:14 I love that place.
36:15 >> You do?
36:16 >> Oh, yes.
36:16 You're an excellent chef.
36:18 As a person, you're a little >> Oh, I'm totally crazy.
36:20 But you like the food.
36:22 >> Very much.
36:23 Okay, then.
36:24 I don't stink.
36:25 I'm a good chef.
36:26 Okay.
36:28 >> Well, I don't want to go.
36:29 I'm having fun.
36:30 >> Well, actually, did either of you pay for this class?
36:33 >> Hey, hey, hey.
36:33 If my friend says it's time to go, it's time to go.
36:40 Isn't this great?
36:43 >> Couldn't you just stay like this forever, >> Chandler?
36:50 Couldn't you just stay here forever?
36:53 >> Yeah, here somewhere else.
36:55 You know, where?
36:55 Wherever.
36:58 >> Are you okay?
36:59 >> Yeah, I'm cool.
37:01 Casual.
37:03 >> What What are you doing?
37:05 Well, just hanging out, you know, having fun, you know,
37:07 with the girl that I'm seeing casually.
37:11 >> Man, I knew it.
37:12 I knew you were going to do this.
37:14 >> What?
37:14 >> Get all freaked out
37:15 because everybody was talking
37:16 and just joking around about marriage
37:18 and stuff.
37:19 >> Well, you you do want all that stuff, right?
37:22 >> Oh, and you know what I want?
37:24 >> Yes, you want babies.
37:25 You have baby fever.
37:28 >> I do not have baby fever.
37:30 >> Oh, please.
37:31 You are obsessed with babies
37:32 and and marriage and everything that's related to babies
37:35 and and and marriage.
37:38 You know what?
37:38 I got a good idea.
37:39 Why don't we turn the heat down on this pressure cooker?
37:43 >> You lost your mind, Taylor.
37:46 This isn't about me.
37:46 This is about you and all your weird relationship commitment crap.
37:50 >> Nuh-uh.
37:50 I know you.
37:51 Okay.
37:51 I know the thoughts that you have in the head in your head.
37:55 >> You don't know everything.
37:57 Did you know that I'm going out with Rachel tonight instead of you?
37:59 Mhm.
38:00 And did you know that the only baby around here is you?
38:03 And did you know that I can't even look at you right now?
38:08 >> Oh The misses.
38:11 >> Can I Can I get a coffee to go?
38:17 >> Okay.
38:18 I'm I'm still not done not wanting to talk to you.
38:20 >> Just tell me what I need to do to make things right.
38:23 >> What?
38:24 >> Well, that's what we do.
38:24 You know, I I mess up
38:26 and then you tell me how to fix it
38:27 and then I do
38:28 and then you know,
38:28 you think I'm all cute again.
38:31 I'm really I'm really tired of being your relationship tutor.
38:35 You're going to have to figure this one out for yourself, right?
38:38 You know what?
38:39 You're too afraid to be in a real relationship.
38:41 Then don't be in one.
38:50 I need to talk to her.
38:51 It's urgent.
38:51 Is she here?
38:52 >> Hi, Monica.
38:54 I need to talk to you.
38:55 It's urgent.
38:57 >> Okay.
38:58 >> Okay.
38:58 I've been doing a lot of thinking about us, you know,
39:00 a lot of uh us thinking.
39:03 And uh well, I guess there's only one one way to do this.
39:11 >> Women, what are you doing, >> Monica?
39:14 >> No, no, no.
39:14 Don't don't don't do it.
39:16 >> Will you marry me?
39:22 I know a bad idea.
39:24 >> Oh, I can't not look at it.
39:28 >> Chandler, why are you doing this?
39:30 >> I don't know, >> but I know I'm not afraid to do this.
39:37 >> Chandler, >> I'm doing this because I'm sorry.
39:42 >> Do you um you really think the best reason to get married is
39:45 because you're sorry?
39:46 >> Well, no.
39:46 The best reason to get married is pregnancy.
39:52 Sorry, it's pretty much fourth, you know,
39:53 behind being ready and actually wanting to get married.
39:57 >> Will you be my wife, >> Jaylor?
40:02 Um, I want you to take just a minute
40:04 and I want you to think about how ridiculous this sounds.
40:11 >> Yeah, I'm kind of wishing everyone wasn't here right now.
40:17 >> Do you know that none of that stuff came from me?
40:18 I mean, I never said
40:19 that I wanted to have babies
40:21 and get married right now.
40:22 >> Yeah, I don't.
40:23 But I was really confused.
40:24 And then I talked to these guys.
40:26 >> Who?
40:26 Two divorces and Joey.
40:30 >> Hey, she's right, you know.
40:33 >> Yeah, but still cheap shot.
40:36 >> Just want you to know that what you witnessed in there,
40:40 that wasn't for fun.
40:43 >> It wasn't fun.
40:45 >> Why?
40:45 Why?
40:45 Why would you?
40:48 I just don't want you to think
40:50 that we're animals who do it whenever we want.
40:53 Oh, >> I don't think that.
40:54 Before today, I never thought of you two having sex at all.
40:58 It was a simpler time.
41:02 >> The truth is, Dad, we're we're trying.
41:06 >> What?
41:06 >> Yeah, we're trying to get pregnant.
41:08 >> Oh my god, this is so exciting.
41:10 We'll get back in there.
41:11 I'll guard the door.
41:14 >> It's okay.
41:15 We We We can wait until later.
41:16 >> Whoa, whoa, whoa.
41:16 I don't think so.
41:17 Aren't you ovulating, >> daddy?
41:20 >> Well, you got to get at it, princess.
41:22 When your mother and I were trying to conceive you, whenever she was ovulating,
41:26 bam, we did it.
41:27 That's how I got my bad hip.
41:31 >> You know what else is really great about him?
41:33 Oh, what is the word for an adult who doesn't have dinosaur toys in
41:37 their bedroom?
41:45 >> >> Um, >> what was that?
41:46 >> Monica knows.
41:48 >> It's this dumb thing that Ross made up to try to fool our parents.
41:51 It's a way of giving the finger without actually having to give it.
41:57 I remember I cried the night you made that up.
42:00 This is the first time I realized I was cooler than my big brother.
42:05 >> Well, I'm going to go get ready. >> >> for my date tonight.
42:14 So, uh, I'll just head.
42:19 >> Well, I feel like a snack.
42:21 >> Do you want some shortbread?
42:22 It's Scottish like you are.
42:25 >> Oh, no thanks.
42:26 I don't like anything from my Scottish heritage.
42:30 What?
42:32 >> >> Well, just my entire family was run out of Scotland by Vikings.
42:39 >> Well, it sounds to me like your family's ready to uh rediscover its
42:43 Scottish roots.
42:44 >> You can't play bag pipes at the wedding.
42:48 >> How did you know about that?
42:50 >> We heard you play all the way from your apartment.
42:52 >> Were you the ones who called the cops?
42:56 >> That's not really important right now.
42:58 What is important is while we appreciate the gesture,
43:02 we just don't feel that bag pipes are appropriate for our wedding.
43:07 >> Why not?
43:07 >> Because we hate them.
43:10 >> Just just give me a chance to perform for you
43:12 and then decide whatever you want.
43:14 And I'm not going to tell you what song I'm going to play either,
43:17 but uh let's just say when it's over,
43:20 I'll bet there'll be a wee bit o celebration.
43:25 Remember, I'm I'm still learning.
43:40 >> 1 2 3 4 You know the song.
44:01 Sing along.
44:24 So No, I >> want to hang out with you guys two nights in
44:26 a row.
44:26 I'm so sorry.
44:28 >> Wh Why did she not want to hang out with us?
44:32 >> Because she uh she she thinks
44:34 that you are blah
44:37 and and that uh you Monica are uh too loud.
44:41 >> What?
44:46 >> What?
44:46 >> So she was just pretending to have a good time last night.
44:49 She was lying to our faces.
44:51 >> I can't believe this.
44:52 I mean, who is she to judge us?
44:53 We could not have been nicer to her.
44:55 >> And I am not blah.
44:56 I am a hoot.
44:59 >> Come on.
45:00 Please.
45:00 Please.
45:00 You guys don't don't be mad.
45:02 I'm sure she just she just said
45:03 that stuff because she was nervous cuz you guys are like my best friends,
45:07 you know, and it was our first date.
45:10 Plus, she's really sick.
45:14 >> No, you she No, you said you made that up.
45:17 >> I know.
45:17 But don't you think the sick thing is way better than the play thing?
45:21 >> They're both good.
45:21 I generally just go with Monica's drunk again.
45:26 >> Come on, you guys.
45:27 Come on.
45:28 Please, please, just give her another chance.
45:30 Huh?
45:30 She'll come around.
45:31 I promise.
45:32 >> Of course, we will.
45:34 Come on.
45:34 We got to make dinner.
45:41 >> Okay.
45:41 >> I do not like that woman.
45:43 >> I CAN HEAR YOU.
45:46 >> >> I AM LOUD.
45:48 WELL, >> I don't care as long as my mom's here.
45:51 >> Oh my god.
45:52 Your mother.
45:52 >> What?
45:53 My mom's not going to be here?
45:54 >> Well, given that we forgot to invite her,
45:56 it would be an awfully big coincidence if she was.
46:00 >> My god.
46:01 >> Well, if it wasn't my fault Phoebe was in charge of the invitations.
46:04 >> Well, I don't I don't have a mother,
46:06 so often I forget that other >> I'll give it a rest.
46:10 >> So, my mother is not coming to my baby shower?
46:15 >> No.
46:15 Neither is mine.
46:18 >> You know what?
46:19 Don't worry, okay?
46:20 We'll take care of it.
46:21 We'll call her.
46:22 You just go home and get ready.
46:23 >> Please make sure she comes.
46:24 It's really important to me.
46:25 I mean, it's my mom.
46:26 >> I know.
46:27 I know.
46:27 What's her number?
46:28 >> I don't know.
46:30 >> Go.
46:30 I have my book.
46:31 Go.
46:39 >> Wait a minute.
46:40 If you're in charge of the invitations,
46:41 why am I the one who has to call her?
46:43 Hello, Mrs. green.
46:44 Hi.
46:44 Uh, it's Monica Geller.
46:46 >> Oh, hello, Monica.
46:47 >> Hi.
46:48 Um, I know this is last minute,
46:49 but we we've decided to throw an impromptu baby shower for Rachel today.
46:54 >> I know.
46:55 My daughters told me about it
46:56 when they received their impromptu invitations a month ago.
47:01 >> I'm sorry.
47:02 I'm I'm so sorry.
47:03 >> For what, dear?
47:04 >> For not inviting me or for lying about it?
47:08 >> Oh my god, my ass is sweating.
47:12 Please, please, can you come?
47:15 It's It's today at 4:00.
47:16 >> Well, all right.
47:18 I'll see you at 4:00.
47:19 >> Thank you.
47:22 >> Isn't it at 3?
47:24 >> Son of a.
47:24 >> I just can't find >> other than the top drawer.
47:28 >> You need one, too?
47:29 >> Oh, yeah.
47:38 >> There's only one.
47:39 Monica.
47:41 >> Hi.
47:42 Uh, we'll be right there.
47:43 We just um we're trying to decide something.
48:01 >> Rachel.
48:01 >> Hey.
48:02 Hey.
48:04 >> They're just trying to decide something.
48:05 >> Oh, good.
48:06 Good.
48:06 Good.
48:13 >> >> So is um was your mustache it used to be different?
48:25 >> No.
48:25 >> Oh, how do you uh you know keep it so neat?
48:30 >> I have a little comb.
48:35 >> Oh, >> and what do you call that?
48:36 Now my mustache gone.
48:38 Thank you.
48:40 >> Okay.
48:41 I I will do your laundry for one month.
48:45 NO.
48:46 OKAY.
48:46 OKAY.
48:47 OKAY.
48:47 I WILL I will I will I Hey,
48:49 I will clean the apartment for 2 months.
48:51 >> All right.
48:52 I'll tell you what.
48:52 I'll give this to you now
48:54 if you can tell me where we keep the dustpan.
49:05 So, were you in, ma'am?
49:12 >> Rock, paper, scissors.
49:15 >> One, two, three.
49:19 >> Yes.
49:19 >> Fine.
49:20 Go have sex.
49:24 NO, you have got it completely wrong.
49:27 John Savage was deer hunter.
49:29 No legs.
49:30 John Voit was coming home.
49:31 Couldn't feel his legs.
49:32 >> No.
49:33 No.
49:33 No way.
49:34 You've got it totally the other way around, my friend.
49:36 Don Voit was what?
49:38 What?
49:48 >> Shall we?
49:49 >> It's not going to happen.
49:50 They're doing it tonight.
49:52 We can do it tomorrow.
49:54 >> Great.
49:54 That's great, Monica.
49:56 Great.
49:58 Now, Chandler, you want to give us a smile?
50:05 >> Okay.
50:05 >> I'm sorry.
50:06 Is the seat uncomfortable?
50:07 >> No, I am.
50:09 >> Can see I know you can do this.
50:11 Okay.
50:11 You have a beautiful smile.
50:13 >> I do?
50:17 >> Yeah.
50:17 >> All right.
50:17 Maybe you don't have to smile.
50:19 Let's try something else.
50:20 Let's try um try looking sexy.
50:30 >> Okay.
50:30 >> Or not.
50:35 I know.
50:36 Let's try a look a far off wonderment.
50:41 Okay.
50:41 We'll we'll gaze into our future
50:43 and we'll think about our marriage
50:45 and the days to come.
50:46 Okay.
50:52 >> >> Taylor, what is the matter with your face?
50:56 Wait, this picture is supposed to say Geller and being to be married,
50:58 not local woman saves drowning >> Hey, don't laugh at him.
51:05 He's my drowning >> That's it.
51:09 That's it.
51:09 Take it.
51:10 Take it.
51:12 >> Do it, Ross.
51:13 >> What?
51:13 >> Want to play football?
51:17 Um, Monica and I aren't supposed to play football.
51:22 >> Says who?
51:22 Your mom.
51:28 >> Yes.
51:28 >> Well, every Thanksgiving, um,
51:30 we used to have a Dutch football game called the the Geller Bowl.
51:34 >> No, no, no.
51:35 You say that proudly.
51:38 >> >> Anyway, Ross
51:39 and I were always captains
51:40 and um it got kind of competitive
51:43 and one year,
51:44 Killer Bowl six, I accidentally broke Ross's nose.
51:50 >> It was so not an accident.
51:52 She saw I was about to tag her,
51:54 so she threw her big fat grandma arm elbow in my face,
51:58 just kept running.
52:00 >> Just score the winning touchdown.
52:02 By the way, >> ho ho ho.
52:04 Uh you did not win the game.
52:05 The touchdown didn't count because of the spectacularly illegal Oh, and by the way,
52:10 savage nose breaking.
52:13 >> I won the game.
52:15 >> Oh, yeah.
52:15 Then how come you didn't get the Geller Cup?
52:20 >> There was a Geller Cup?
52:22 >> Yes, it was the trophy you got if you won the game.
52:25 But our dad said nobody won that game.
52:27 And he was sick of our fighting,
52:28 so he took the trophy. >> >> threw it in the lake.
52:40 >> And was the curse lifted?
52:43 >> Did you know Chandler kissed Rachel?
52:45 >> What?
52:46 When When was this?
52:47 >> 1987.
52:49 The weekend you guys visited me at school.
52:52 >> Oh my god, that's wild.
52:54 >> Yeah, but it was like a million years ago, so it doesn't matter.
52:56 >> Well, it matters to me.
52:58 >> Why?
52:58 >> Because the night you kissed Rachel was the night I kissed Rachel for
53:01 the very first time.
53:03 You kissed her that night, too?
53:05 >> Two guys in one night.
53:07 Wow.
53:07 I thought she became a sled after she got her nose fixed.
53:12 >> Seriously, where did this happen?
53:13 >> Okay, after you told me she was passed out in our room,
53:17 I went in there to make sure she was all right.
53:19 She was lying on my bed, all buried in people's coats.
53:23 Well, I I went to kiss her on the forehead, you know,
53:25 but it was so dark, I accidentally got her lips.
53:28 I I started to pull away,
53:29 but then I I felt her start to kiss me back.
53:31 It was only for a second, but it was amazing.
53:35 And now, now I find out that you kissed her first.
53:38 >> Wait, what bed did you say she was on?
53:42 >> Mine.
53:42 >> I'm pretty sure I put her on my bed.
53:43 >> No, she was definitely on my bed.
53:45 >> Why would I kiss a girl and then put her on your bed?
53:49 >> Well, then who was on my bed?
53:50 >> Oh.
53:51 Oh.
53:51 OH, >> NO.
53:55 NO, NO, >> you were under the pile of coats.
54:01 I was the pile of coats.
54:07 >> Oh my god.
54:09 >> You were my midnight mystery kisser.
54:14 >> YOU WERE MY FIRST KISS WITH RACHEL.
54:18 >> You were my first kiss ever.
54:23 >> WHAT DID I MARRY INTO?
54:25 >> I think this is so cool.
54:26 I mean, none of our friends are here, so we can, you know,
54:28 could be a real couple.
54:29 We don't have to hide.
54:30 I know.
54:30 I can do this.
54:32 >> Oh, and I can do this.
54:36 >> We can't do that.
54:37 >> We can't do that.
54:38 No.
54:40 >> Hey, bing.
54:42 >> Whoa.
54:43 Who's the pretty lady and what the hell she doing with you?
54:47 >> I asked myself that very question, sir.
54:49 This is Monica.
54:50 This is my boss, Doug.
54:51 Doug, this is Monica.
54:52 >> Hi.
54:52 Nice to meet you.
54:53 >> Hi.
54:53 And this is my wife, Cara.
54:55 >> Nice to meet you, Monica.
54:56 >> Bing.
55:00 >> Okay.
55:00 Hey, uh, Bing, did you hear about the new law firm we got working
55:01 for us?
55:01 >> No, sir.
55:02 >> Yeah.
55:02 Do we cheat them and how?
55:08 >> Come on, honey.
55:08 Let's go drink our body weight.
55:09 Huh?
55:12 >> What was that?
55:14 >> What?
55:14 >> That noise you just made.
55:15 >> Oh, that was my work laugh.
55:17 >> Your work laugh?
55:18 >> Oh, can't believe me.
55:19 If you're going to survive this party,
55:20 you're going to have to come up with one, too.
55:23 >> All right.
55:24 Check me out.
55:26 >> Okay.
55:26 >> Says $30, father. same as in town.
55:32 >> And I called the caterer.
55:33 I added two extra meals.
55:35 We are good to go.
55:36 >> Yeah, they're not coming.
55:41 >> What?
55:41 >> Somehow they got the idea that you only invited them because of me.
55:44 They feel a little unwanted.
55:47 >> Oh, that's too bad.
55:48 It's true, but too bad.
55:51 >> Look, Mom.
55:52 If you could just call my mom.
55:53 >> Oh, Joey.
55:54 >> Come on.
55:54 Look, just just let her know that you really want them to be there.
55:56 Let's not forget this is a woman who has sent you many lasagnas over
56:00 the years.
56:00 >> No, she hasn't.
56:01 >> Is it her fault if some of them didn't make it to you?
56:05 >> What am I going to say?
56:06 >> I don't know.
56:06 Just uh just tell them there was a mix up with the invitations
56:09 or No,
56:09 no, no.
56:10 Blame it on the post office.
56:11 They hate the post office and the Irish,
56:15 but I don't think you could blame it on them.
56:17 So, >> hello.
56:22 Yeah.
56:22 Hi, uh Mrs.
56:23 Tribani.
56:24 Hi, this is Monica Geller.
56:26 Yeah, I'm I'm just calling to say
56:27 that Chandler and I really hope
56:29 that you can make it to the wedding.
56:30 Yeah, apparently a bunch of the invitations that we sent uh weren't delivered.
56:34 Um I guess there was some screw up at the damn post office.
56:41 Tell me about it.
56:42 Yeah.
56:43 Yeah, the US post office.
56:44 No, more like US lost office.
56:48 What are they?
56:49 Irish.
56:51 >> The cheese, please.
56:58 >> >> My god, you can't even look at me, can you?
57:03 >> Nope.
57:03 >> Yay, it's BB.
57:04 WE CAN TALK TO BB.
57:07 >> NO, I'm I'm too depressed to talk.
57:10 >> I'll give you $1,000 to talk to us.
57:13 >> Hey, you guys, what do you what do you think about making
57:16 that beach trip an annual thing?
57:19 >> No.
57:19 >> All right, that's it, you guys.
57:21 What happened out there?
57:22 >> What?
57:23 We took a walk.
57:24 Nothing happened.
57:26 I came back with nothing all over me.
57:29 >> Come on.
57:30 What happened, Joey?
57:33 >> All right.
57:34 >> No, Joey.
57:35 We swear we'd never tell.
57:36 >> They'll never understand.
57:42 We have to say something.
57:43 We have to get it out.
57:44 It's eating me alive.
57:48 >> Monica got stung by a jellyfish.
57:50 >> All right.
57:55 All right.
58:00 I got stung.
58:03 Stung bad.
58:06 I couldn't stand.
58:07 I I couldn't walk.
58:10 We were two miles from the house.
58:14 We were scared and alone.
58:17 We didn't think we could make it.
58:24 I was in too much pain >>
58:25 and I was tired from digging the huge hole.
58:30 >> And then Joey remembered something.
58:34 I'd seen this thing on the Discovery Channel.
58:37 >> Wait a minute.
58:37 I saw that on the Discovery Channel.
58:40 Yeah.
58:40 About jellyfish and how if you e you peed on yourself.
58:51 E, you can't say that.
58:53 You You don't know.
58:55 I thought I was going to pass out from the pain.
58:58 Anyway, I I tried, but I I couldn't been that way.
59:13 So, >> that's right, I stepped up.
59:18 >> >> She's my friend and she needed help.
59:21 If I had to, I'd pee on any one of you.
59:29 Only uh I couldn't.
59:35 I got the stage fright.
59:39 I wanted to help, but there was just too much pressure.
59:41 So So I uh I TURNED TO CHANDLER.
59:48 >> >> JOY KEPT SCREAMING at me, "DO IT NOW.
59:50 DO IT.
59:51 DO IT.
59:51 DO IT NOW."
59:54 >> Sometimes late at night, I can still hear the screaming.
60:00 That's cuz sometimes I just do it through my wall to freak you out.
